I have totally no idea what's up with my mum. First i asked her if she wants to go Bangkok with me or not. Then she said she don't want cos she wants to go somewhere further, so she ask me to go with my friends. Fine, so now that i found friends to go with me to Bangkok, She's not happy. Say i waste money, what the hell la ok. Just because she don't like lex (sorry bro) that's why she don't want me to go. So i said, "hello, you are the one who don't want to go with me. And they are the only people whom want to go. So what's your problem?" Am i right?

And she knows that i want to go Thailand for damn long already la. Like since sec 2 until now i haven been there before? AARRRGG

And now, she's giving me attitude. What the hell la, she's just pissing me off. When my brother came back from Bangkok yesterday, she was like (to my brother) "She also want to go wor." In the very sarcastic tone. Like, i have nothing better else to do like that.

Whatever man, i am still going whether she likes it or not. I mean after all, i am not using her money, i am using my own money for all the expenses. So just heck.

Labels: ANGRY

My goodness, 4 days more. 4 DAYS 4 DAYS 4 DAYS. And i will be out of thomson plaza. My goodness, i hate that place. It's driving me crazy. Arg!!

Tai tai doesn't mean that you can be rude and not apologise. Money doesn't mean you rule the world.

I want to die!!! It's october soon. 14 weeks to school reopen.

Labels: I wish i could

Thomson plaza is boring. People there is weird. They talk very soft and they ask funny questions. ??!?!

It's moon cake festival today and i have yet ate any mooncakes. -_- I want mooncake with double yoke. Suddenly mooncakes reminds me of someone. Never mind.

Don't say those words if that wasn't what you meant or if it isn't something you can keep up to. Don't make me fall again.

Sometimes i hate you, cos you made me so reserved and suspicious towards girls now. You made me lose trust in love, when it's something i yearn for so much. I wonder if you ever feel guilty for what you did to me.

I am not good looking, i'm ultra casual, i wear shirt, berms and flip flops everywhere i go. I am fat, i don't take initiative, i don't bother most of the time. So why will you like me?

I am so so so so tired.

Fri - watched movie and reached home at 1. Slept at 2 plus 3 cos i want to finish up my book. I still think they should get together, =(( Anyhow, dad told me he'll wake up at 8

Sat- So i woke up at 7 to bath and packed my bag. Got everything done in 49 mins and dad woke up at 845 instead -_- I could have slept in later you know? met puiyen at 1 and ate lunch, went club and played and trained. It was tiring cos it was physical and i haven been going for training. Opps. Went for dinner and watched late night movie. Reached home at like 2 plus 3.

Sun- Woke up at 6 cos i'm meeting Jamie for breakfast before heading to pasir ris. Went on excursion at Zero spot laundry. Rushed down to church right after we got back to hui suo. Sermon was great, but i know it'll be greater if i have wasn't that sleepy. =((

Hang around in church until esmond and peck finish prac. 3 long hours in church doing nothing. *^%#@! But ame and i did spent some quality time together, right ame?

Fire works was fun. Back to childhood, as fascinated as ever, Haha. Was suppose to watch secret after everyone bathe but i happily fell asleep on the sofa after a few minutes. Thought i slept only awhile but Colin and peck said i slept in a very awkward and uncomfortable position for almost an hour. Ohhh.

Woke up at 9, ate and went off to work. Oh god. I fell asleep a thousand times. Like i was chewing my food and i fell asleep half way chewing. -_-

I was surprise to see you again after so long and i really hope we can start a new and be friends again since we'll be seeing each other quite often now? oh well.

Labels: night world

Guess what, i woke up at 1247 today. I was suppose to wake up early!! Anyhow, today's my off day again. But I'll be back in battle tomorrow. I so have nothing to blog but i so want to blog. Actually i was thinking if i should go back home one of the days because Matthew just flown to hongkong yesterday so mum would be alone at home. Like really on her own. But guess it wouldn't make any diff whether we're there or not because she'll just be on the phone.

I kind of miss school. I was looking back on my past posts and i realise that i kind of miss school. I miss campus, i miss MLT, i miss burger buster, i miss my classmates. They won't be my classmates next year and i'm rather upset about it. It wouldn't be that bad i guess. I mean, new year, new start. Everything would be different. One thing faynat and i was talking about is that our phone bill would definately go down by ALOT after she goes back to indo. And i would just have people like, ame, peck, joyce, sometimes zan and sometimes june they all. The other's kind of like, not in contact? haha.

I was planning to work part time in school or something. At lease i'll be able to earn some money for next year. It goes this way, parents stop giving you money gradually because it's time for you to learn how to earn for a living. It's time when you want money from them, they'll say they will only lend it to you, return when you get your pay or something. Yes, not that they're really that broke that they need you to return, but they just want you to know you are no longer in that age of taking money from parents for granted anymore.

I guess working in HV/0102 has made me grow much in responsibilities and not only that, taught me many other things. Now i learn that, life could be much more simpler if you learn how to cherish. Many sayings in this world sound so simple that many just neglect or never really took the effort to dwell into the phrase and take a ride of imaginary experience. If we can do it often, you'll realise that life could be easier.

Anyway, as usual. Just a small post after i change blogskin. I wonder when will the time i can finally settle for a blogskin for long. I have been changing skin like every month or something. haha.

It's boring here. As much as i want to bond with my dad, it seems impossible because he is home late, claudia will be talking or setting an invisible boundaries that says "I hold an ownership to him so you better not get anywhere near him." Or maybe my step-mum's there and i wasn't able to talk to him openly. Oh dear, this keyboard is getting hard to type.

As much as i want to talk to my sister normally, i can't. Simply because i can't stand her attitude. She has this huge attitude problem that i think i should talk to her about it soon. When she's lees annoying to me. From now til then, let's just ignore her?

Labels: anoit me with gift of loving., Dear god

I loev the feeling of typing after you cut your long fingre nails. I hate long finger nails. It doesn't allow me to typr smoothly. And i have to typr really carefully in order not to let it scratch my keypads.

Anyhow, today's my off day. My goodness. I can finally finally slack at home the whole day doing nothing. Boy, i love this so much.

Watched The invasion and i'll rate it... 3 starts? Or maybe 2. Because it wasn't trilling enough to be a triller show, it has too much talking. Only the ending was alright. At lease they didn't make nicole kidman and oliver to be aliens. My goodness, oliver is so cute i swear. hee.

I think it's so difficult to talk on the phone at night in my dad's house. Cos it's small, and it's quiet. Probably every singlr word i said he can hear it from his room. Anyhow, i can't really whisper too cos apprently Tan Faynat talks DAMN LOUD. And i sometimes have to raise my voice so that she will shut up and listen to me. haha. Qi si wo i tell you.

Sigh, i don't know where's Maria. I don't know what time she's coming back. Just hope that claudia's coming home late today cos i kinda need to peace.

Labels: =S

It's been long since i last went online. Everyady's a long and tired day for me. And today, i'm having my off day. Kind of reluctant to go church today cos i really want to rest at home? Service starts at 5 so i was planning to slack till 4 then leave the house, but i've got follow-up at 230, so oh wells, can't really rest but that's alright, cos i know i won't regret after the follow up.

Anyhow, let's blog about this week. I am working 11 hours everyday

Monday,
Woke up at 1100. Bathed and ate breakfast. Was kind of late and it was raining (i think) so i decided to take a cab to work although it's only a 10 minutes walk from my dad's house to cine. Anyhow, i had 20 cabs passing me with wither hired sign or those pretend-never-see-you cab uncles. After 15 good mintues i got on the cab and there was jam, so i took 20 minutes to reach cine. What the hell.

Tuesday,
Another day of eleven hours. Town was like a dead land. Nobody was there. Foodcourt have only 9 people excluding store tenders. Pathetic huh? Sales was bad too because there's nobody. Went back to clementi because i forgot to bring clubbing clothes for Faiz's party. Mum was waiting for me went i got home. She help me prepare for the com and stuff then went to sleep after i came home. THANK YOU MUMMY!!

Wednesday,
Eleven hours again. Boss sent me to Zouk. Party till the thing is over. Saw Liqing!! OHMIGOD!! For your info, she's one mof my favourtite seniors ever in my St Margs life. She was very nice to me and very encouraging also. So yes, i bump into her after 3 years. Hee. Wanted to go balcony but sook fong was sleeping already so we bought food and sat at youth park till 6 plus in the morning.

Thursday,
Surprisingly i wasn't tired or sleepy at all. Came across this venting machine and i was so thirsty, so i decided to pop some coins for a can, BUT, total of the coins i had was only 1.20 and the mininum was 1.30. FINE!! So i spend that 10 minutes cursing that machine until i got home.

Friday,
I woke up early cos i want to watch some tv. But my dear claudia have to snatch that bloody remote control with me. WHAT THE HELL!! She is damn selfish i swear, she can watch everyday right? I'm only here for a few days so can't you just let me watch channels that i want? AARRGG!!! Went for work and yeah, some childish people came to my store and mess up the whole store. They practically mess up every shirt. Grow up people, that appears extremely childish. I don't mind folding clothes so by doing that won't piss me off at all.

Daddy came to fetch my from work and we went for supper at newton. I stayed up late last night watching princess d. But faynat insist it's not princess d cos she never see edison chen when he appeared so many times. -_-

People who tagged my blog, i'm sorry i took so long to reply.

People who comment on my tattoo: If you really want to get one then get one that you won't regret. Anyhow, it's only painful during the process after that you'll forget about the pain totally, really.

People who comment on the indian part : Haha, my mum's really against indians. Against until very bps those kind some more. Last time when i wath vasaatham she'll off the tv. Serious. haha

People who wants to catch up: Hey, call me or something. I've cahnged my number to. Oh no, i just remember i don't know my number. Haha. eh, leave me your number on my friendster and i'll contact you. Hee.

Ok i need to bath now and off to church. Chaos people

Labels: I still dislike claudia au zhi qing

I was just thinking today, that if i want to make friends, why not make friends with someone whom you like and you know you can trust? I'd rather only have friends whom i can talk to about anything without feeling awkward. I may have aquitance so just let them be.

If you have friends who can bitch behind your back, then they ain't really your good friend. I am not a good friend i know. But i guess it's common. Anyhow, from now on i'll just get myself comfortable. It's better to be with someone you're comfortable with than hanging out with people you can't be yourself.

I wouldn't be coming online for a long time because i 'm staying with my dad for quite some time. My boss stationed me in cine so i guess i should stay over his place since it's so near and that also means that i can wake up later. hee. I'll miss mummy, definately.

HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL 2!!!! IN 18 HOURS MORE!!! HEE

As said, it's been awhile. Since i last blogged, since i last giving it a thought.

It was the same as last year when i give a thought about this time in the year. It is nobody's fault i know. I mean, the world can't stop just for me alone. Unless i'm as big shot as the president.

When i recieved that msg, i can't control my emotion. I know i shouldn't have expected that much from anyone, but having the thought that i would be spending alone and that even my own family menbers won't be able to take up the time to celebrate with me, makes me realised how pathetic i am. Not that i don't have friends, but neither do i have really much friends who will be there. I know of afew, but i bet they might have something on too.

I have no idea when i became to insecure that whatever i do or whatever i am going to do, i kind of like doing it for others. And i dislike that idea. I very much want the old nicole, the nicole who is so carefree that she couldn't bring herself to care much about the judgement others pass. My god, i so miss her.

Anyhow, take it as i am being emotional or thinking wild for the moment.

Nicole Christine Au
Eleven December 1987
Hongkonger